Jun 212013
 

the longest day, ACBLMy daughter and I experienced the longest goodbye during my husband’s decade-long struggle with Alzheimer’s dementia. Henry died in March of this year.

Henry taught me to play bridge more than 30 years ago when we were courting. My daughter, as a little girl, learned how to play the game while sitting on his knee.  Playing bridge became a tradition with my family as we played weekly with friends, and whenever we went to California to visit Henry’s mother (also a very fine bridge player).

All day today, people across the country are doing the things they love as part of The Longest Day, an Alzheimer’s Association event to raise funds and awareness.  Some will participate by hiking, cycling, swimming, sailing, bowling, dancing, painting, running, skateboarding or rock climbing. We are playing bridge.  The Longest Day gives my daughter Kristen and me a chance to honor his memory in a very tangible way.  I am very grateful that Donna Compton, the owner of our bridge club in Dallas, chose to participate in this very special day.

Henry was a brilliant scientist, unfailingly kind and interested in making a difference in the world and in people’s lives.  He was diagnosed with posterior cortical atrophy, a variant of Alzheimer’s, in 2006; but continued working until May of 2009, when he retired after 31 years with the United States Environmental Protection Agency—determined to continue living according to his goals instead of giving in to depression or desperation.  He and my daughter stayed active in the community, especially with the YMCA for which they both raised thousands of dollars each year during the Y’s scholarship fund drive. Before he passed away, Henry made the decision to donate his body to the University of Texas Southwestern Medical Center Memory Research Unit.   Until the very end, he was committed to doing what he could to make a difference.

Participating in The Longest Day allows me to be part of a movement and most importantly, carry on my husband’s legacy for the study and eventual eradication of this dreadful disease.  My involvement in this event has given me a new perspective on everything we’ve gone through over the last few years. As I play bridge, I will reflect upon the truly blessed life we had and the nobility with which my dear husband faced his inevitable decline.

I feel as if I owe my service to Henry, to my community and to all of those suffering with Alzheimer’s disease as well as their loved ones.  Seeing our community and others come together shows me that this disease affects everyone in some way.  Sharing our stories, journeys and supporting one another has been an incredible experience. I can only hope that what we do today, in this unified effort, will truly have a lasting impact for the Alzheimer’s Association and the fight to find a cure for this devastating disease.

About the Blog Author: Laura Onsgard lives in Dallas, Texas.  She is participating in Alzheimer’s Association The Longest Day®, a sunrise-to-sunset event to raise funds and awareness for Alzheimer’s care, support and research.

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