Four years ago, Mom quit her job so that she could come help me with my twin boys after they were born. I was an exhausted first-time mom who had no clue what I was doing. It was a huge relief to have her by my side during that time.
I started to notice little things about Mom that were different; rather than read too much into anything, I figured that we were both just exhausted. Then the little things started to happen more often. After many doctor’s appointments and tests, my parents visited the Mayo Clinic. It was there, in September of 2011, that my mom was diagnosed with early-onset Alzheimer’s disease at the age of 59.
I was stunned, paralyzed with fear. People that young didn’t get Alzheimer’s, did they? Would she wake up and just not know me? What is Alzheimer’s, really? Now what? What do we do?
These were all questions that went through my head. To be honest, they still do. I lived in denial for a long time, doing more research than I knew what to do with. The doctors were wrong, I thought. Some days she seems fine!
It took me a long time to accept the “new version” of Mom. I would get so frustrated, not knowing how to comprehend the disease. I finally sat down with her one day after we put the boys down for a nap, and I asked her what it was like. I wanted to know. I wanted to understand.
She tried as best as she could to explain her thoughts and feelings to me. We cried a lot; we still cry a lot. My mom is my best friend, and her diagnosis has been a long slow process for me. I knew then that I needed to do something to fight for Mom, and fight so I don’t have to live with this disease myself. I needed to find a way to deal with what was happening and to surround myself with people that understood.
Since I can’t change Mom’s diagnosis, I decided to fight like crazy to change it for someone else.
This last weekend was my second time walking in the Walk to End Alzheimer’s in St. Cloud, Minnesota. Joining Walk to End Alzheimer’s is about more than just raising money for me. While it’s so important to fund research that leads to a cure, my biggest mission is to spread awareness. I want to educate people about what Alzheimer’s really is, and how the ability to complete daily tasks that so many people – including me –take for granted are a huge struggle for my mom and so many others with the disease. Connecting with others in our community at Walk who understand what we are going through is so comforting, and uniting to make a difference is such a great feeling! Being involved with Walk to End Alzheimer’s has been very therapeutic for me, because I know I am working hard to make a difference. I also know my mom is proud and grateful for what I am doing.
Our family has always been very close-knit; while it’s not always easy, we try to maintain traditions and create new memories, because we are in this together. We understand how each other feels. We are going to fight endlessly so that others don’t have to slowly lose their mother the way I am. This is not a disease that should be hidden or kept quiet. Alzheimer’s is taking over our population, and people need to know what’s happening. We need to talk about this disease. We need to help educate people. We need to Walk.
About the Author: Meghan Blenker, 30, is a mother of three. She Walks as Team Captain of Grammy’s Gang.